Co-sleeping in the Bible: Why co-sleeping is crucial to a secure parent-child bond

Many parents think that co-sleeping is a bad thing. Some sexualize the practice, and some simply fear children becoming "dependent" on sleep next to parents. The fact of the matter is that co-sleeping is the most time-honored parenting tactic in the book, and serves to tether the parent-child bond, bringing children close to parents, and vice versa.

The centerpiece of an attached Christian parenting relationship is Christian love, which is denoted by the Greek root word αγαπαο (Latin: agapao) and refers to prioritizing children first, and yourself as a parent last, in a convicted way leading to dutiful and selfless submission to children and their every vulnerable need, expecting absolutely nothing in return from children or others, with children resting safely and securely in parents. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) and refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and grace of parents. This form of respect for parents does not come from fearful compliance, but from restful trust in parents, with children telling parents anything and everything that is on their minds, including admissions of wrongdoing or non-conforming traits, expecting absolutely no punishment or reprisal in return. Children in this sort of restful, secure environment take after their parents, wanting to be like parents, which leads to children following the example of parents and other adults. Children won't follow your example right away, as children of a certain developmental level will not understand how to behave, meaning a child's brain isn't fully developed yet. When the brain isn't fully developed, a child will not be able to understand instructions from parents the first time, or the next time, or the next for that matter. When they are teenagers and young adults, they should be able to follow the disciplined example of Christian parents.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or abuse, namely child abuse in this context. Child abuse, under biblical law, at minimum, is defined as the slightest of personal offense perceived by the child, including the slightest of offensive touch and speech perceived by the child, coming from entitlement, and is prosecutable as kidnapping/grand theft. In this commandment, the Apostle Paul was lifting up the Law against punishment and controlling demeanor towards children, rebuking Greek Christians for bringing their pagan custom of spanking children into the church. Christian parents of Greek origin were misusing the book of Proverbs as a justification for their punishment habits even in the 1st Century, when this passage was written. Paul was warning parents then that Proverbs is simply wisdom literature - a list of wise sayings - and not a book that carries commands on parenting. The rod verses in particular refer to a practice in Judaism - a form of judicial corporal punishment - and at that, a dated Jewish practice. It does not refer to anything regarding raising children.

Young children up until age 6 often have trouble going to sleep on their own. This is a common motive for punishing a child - they just won't go to bed. This is because they are still too young to sleep on their own. Children under age 6 have primal instincts that alarm them that there might be predators around if they aren't next to mothers all of the time. In ancient times, predators included snakes and scorpions, but also the human kind. Fathers had a parent attraction to their children, usually of the low-level connotational level, with children being naked everywhere they went. Mothers slept next to children in biblical times, guarding children until they felt safe sleeping on their own...The context contained herein this paragraph is crucial in understanding the importance of co-sleeping.

Children, yes, were naked wherever they went. Mothers also were naked when at home, in order to serve their husbands and children, separately. Mothers didn't just sleep next to their children to get them to sleep, but slept next to them the whole night through, with the young child snuggled up next to mother, in skin-to-skin fashion, engaging in pure closeness and intimacy with young children. Mothers were completely disrobed, and the children naked, when mothers slept next to their children, with children up until age 3 being breastfed throughout the night...This context may seem dated, but it can be applied today, if the intent on both ends is sexually pure.

Children in biblical times shook off their parents on their own regarding co-sleeping. Children started going to bed on their own at different, graduating ages starting at age 6, slowly spending more time away from parents, yet in their supervision nonetheless. Sleep dependence is a myth fueled by limited research as opposed to the rich experience of attachment parents. Even with children with autism or other developmental disorders, children shake off their parents eventually, usually in their mid teens. In attachment parenting homes, the shaking off of parents with children with developmental disabilities is simply a gradual struggle to be independent that may take years into adulthood, and starts with the adolescent child automatically and instinctively knowing that they are older, and adjusting to their age by shaking off their parents.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torrents, suffering God's Wrath forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!