Benign deprivation: Why this is false doctrine

John Rosemond is the father of authoritative parenting, meaning in this case the man who perverted it and turned it into abuse. One of his abusive doctrines are one of benign deprivation, meaning the idea that children need to hear the word "no" more than they need to.

Benign deprivation was an abusive policy of my childhood, imposed by my parents, namely my father. My father then believed that saying "no" all the time would lead to "resiliency" in children. No, just resentment, to the point that even he could not defy my reverent rebellion against his grasp. It started with me, being an atheist then, shunning my father in a religious way. Then, he started to get the message. If he didn't, I'd relish in his death, in fact - I'm that hateful of a trauma survivor towards parents. Whereas, because he apologized and made amends, I took his death the hardest - I had to remind myself that he was going "up" and not the opposite, due to the fact that he was imperfect by his own admission. I am allowed to hate parents, including my own when they fall from grace and defend it, because "honor parents" is a conditional commandment for parents, based on how much respect is earned based on the perception of children.

It says in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and refers to the admonition of the Lord, meaning in context the rare use of the word "no", not the frequent use of the word, otherwise letting kids do whatever they will, and supervising younger children especially for safety purposes. This tenet of biblical parenting was weighed against the Greek root word translated "provoke...to wrath", which is παροργιζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers to the moral crime of provoking your neighbor to anger through your own fits of anger, ultimately referring to the offenses system under the Eighth Commandment, namely the slightest of offense perceived by a child in reaction to entitled behavior of adults. 

In ancient Israel and adjoining churches, children had more freedom, while at the same time being in close range to mothers in general. The word "no" was a rare occasion, otherwise mothers and fathers alike compromised with their children, or else supervised children to keep them safe, knowing instinctively and intuitively that sometimes children are too young to understand the reason behind the word "no", and then just keep on doing what they are doing anyway. In an unsafe situation, this calls for logical consequences, but even then, just baby proof the house with plugs for electrical outlets, and also baby gates. But, if they try to climb up the gate, pick them up and hold them close while they cry, reassuring and validating their lost desire to explore further, which is understandable given their age and development. Save a firm "no" to things like sexual exploration, but even then, all you have to say is "not appropriate" in a firm tone, then "private parts are private", but when you punish a child in such an instance, meaning spank them, you are sexually shaming them. Redirect them to their own bodies, perhaps? "No" should be a rare word in parenting, and even then, there is usually a nicer way to say it. Most declines are due to children pushing the boundaries, meaning not of parents, but of their environment, as a form of exploration.

Children should be allowed to explore. Also, parents should be selfless in how they serve the needs of their child, assuming any benign want is a need, meaning an attachment need. If in doubt, see how the need to, say, eat out all the time gets you and your child together. Attachment is spending time with children, showing unconditional love in your actions, with talk being cheap, and parents proving their love through treating children with kindness, respect, and non-violence.

Benign deprivation is a form of entitlement towards children, meaning an attempt to control out of convenience for the parent. The Greek root word denoting parental entitlement is πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers to wanting comfort and convenience just because "I am the parent", to the point of seeking to impose said want onto a child, leading to abuse by way of offense perceived by the child.

The depraved and entitled parents will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them rot and burn in the lake of fire and brimstone, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!