"Benign deprivation": Why the frequent use of the word "no" is child abuse

Many parents think that children need to hear the word "no" frequent and often. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. Most American parents think that children need to be told "no" all the time. However, American parents need an attitude adjustment on this issue. Using the word "no" all the time can be child abuse.

God's Law on child abuse is spelled out in Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. Child abuse in the Bible, as a legal concept, entails entitlement in parents, leading to offense in child. This commandment calls for Christian parents to avoid offense in children. One way to avoid offense in a child is to apologize meaningfully whenever your child's feelings are hurt by the word "no", lest it be officially an offense in a child. However, if you ever say "no" out of anger or haste, you should definitely apologize to your child, then committing to never losing your cool as a parent ever again, as losing your cool as a parent, in and of itself, is entitlement. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christian parents who insisted on pagan parenting, which was punitive in nature. Paul, contrary to popular legend, opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

Customary law in the Early Church prohibited, as a general rule, the word "no" in parenting. The only exception was if the petitioned request of children was unsafe, unworkable, and/or immoral. Whenever a child could not accept the word "no", they were given reassurance of good intentions from parents, and then were helped through their upset by mothers especially. 

Even in the case where a declined request was necessary, Christian parents in the Early Church used nicer-sounding words than "no". These words included statements such as "that won't work", "that can't happen", or "that isn't possible". Usually, that was all that was needed to cushion the blow when children couldn't have what they wanted.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which  is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!