Passing down the faith: How to instruct your child in the Lord without punishment or force

Many parents think that children need religious instruction. However, most parents equate religious instruction with punishment. It is a common belief amongst Christian parents in particular that children have a broken will before surrendering to Christ. However, there is a better way of passing down the faith to children - catch them studying the Bible, and then praise them.

God's Law on child discipline is spelled out in Ephesians 6:4 KJV:

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 

This first stanza clarifies for the second that religious instruction should not hurt. The Greek root word translated  "provoke...to wrath" is παροργίζο (Latin: parorgizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. Not only do children lack a will to be broken, but parents instead have the moral obligation to avoid offense in children, especially in the course of their religious instruction. The key to avoiding offense in children is being willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt their feelings. It is especially imperative to apologize for offending your child when you lose your cool, as losing your cool alone as a parent constitutes entitlement. But, even refusing to apologize to a child for upsetting them alone is entitlement, in and of itself. Christian parents in the Early Church did not force their religious beliefs onto children, as that alone is entitlement, but especially so when it led to offense in a child. This commandment cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul, in this stanza, convicting a group of Greek Christian who brought into the parish at Ephesus their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which is a Latin phrase roughly translating to "power to the parent", including the power to impose punitive sanctions on children, including spanking and other forms of punishment towards children. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

Religious instruction should be fun, not painful, with the first stanza of this commandment ruling out any religious instruction that hurts or is painful. The Greek root word translated "admonition" is νουθεσία (Latin: nouthesia) and is better translated as "instruction" (see more modern translations such as the English Standard Version). This word ultimately refers to religious instruction, as was done then. When children turned age 6, fathers left out a Bible for children to discover and explore. When children were caught in the act of studying the Bible, they were lavishly praised and encouraged, with fathers interjecting "you can ask me anything you want about that book" From there, religious instruction came in the form of question and answer, with children being eager to learn about Scripture, with fathers giving pointers on the context. This form of religious instruction is part of the Jewish tradition of catching children being good, in the form of positive reinforcement. This Hebraic tradition dated millennia before the time of Christ.

Many Christian parents rush their children's religious development. Most Christian parents want their children to have values, and that's all that most Christian parents want. One example of parents jumping the gun is forcing children into grateful postures. Children naturally find the grateful postures as their religious beliefs develop. I myself am a Christian, and I tie my hands behind my back whenever I go out and about, in order to remind my neighbor that they are in the presence of the elect. Your child will get there - just give them time. If your child ends up comfortable in grateful postures, you have done good as a Christian parent. If you force them to show grateful postures, they will learn to hate those postures, hindering their religious development.

Christian parents should not break the will of their child. Children do not have a will to be broken. Yet, most Christian parents insist on breaking the will of their children. However, the fact of the matter is that religious instruction should not be painful. The idea is to catch children in their curiosity about the Bible, and then encouraging Bible study in children. When children had questions about what they were reading. they asked dad for clarification, with fathers giving pointers as to the context. 

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to wrath through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burnng sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!