Child authority: Why children rule over parents (and not vice versa)

Many parents think they are the ones in charge in relation to children. This is a common attitude amongst American parents. However, most American parents don't know that the Bible has a very different setup of the family, called mutual submission. Children had divine authority over their parents in the biblical context, and this colors the text, as God writes to His Audience.

Child authority is part of the Christian doctrine of mutual submission. See Colossians 3:20-21 KJV:

Children, obey your parents in all things: for this is well pleasing unto the Lord. Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged,  

The Greek root word translated "obey" is υπακουο (Latin: hupakouo) which refers to secure, vulnerable rest in the love and submission of parents. This Greek word refers ultimately to secure attachment between parent and child. This secure attachment comes from parent submission, where parents are to submit to their children from beneath yet from above.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to damages or offenses, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. This commandment was intended by the Apostle Paul, and understood in its original context, as a moral statute prohibiting all forms of punitive parenting, including, but not limited to, any punishments, reprimands, or other controlling demeanor towards children. In the Old Testament, punitive parents were put to death by way of bloodletting, after punishing their children one last time. Parents who punished their children were charged with kidnapping, with "kidnapping" being defined as the slightest of damages or offenses stemming from hostage-taking - child punishment was seen in biblical times as holding your child hostage merely for things that they did wrong, thereby treating your child as a quartered slave. Paul here was lifting up the Law in order to convict a group of Greek Christian parents who brought their pagan custom of spanking and punishing their children into the church. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punishment of a child in his secular writings. Paul may not have gotten along with the women, but he sure loved children, and even took in a few orphaned children in his time. Indeed, Greco-Roman fathers used the scourge of cords in order to punish their children, but NOT the Christians among them - the Early Christians were hated largely for being "too soft" on their children.

Children, in biblical times, held divine authority over parents, from above yet from beneath. By default, parents had to heed to the demands of their children, obeying the every stated order of children. The only exception where righteous disobedience of a child's orders is when the orders are unworkable and/or immoral. Your role as a parent is a mere server, and your child can order anything, as long as it is on the menu. Children call the shots in Christian households, or at least they should.

When children were young, meaning under age 6, the every cry of a child was seen as a lawfully binding order, meaning the child was seen as petitioning for their every need. It was just up to the mother to diagnose the need, and provide based on what the crying was about. Children never cry without a reason, and the more raw the secure attachment, the more obvious that reason is. 

This submission on the part of parents eventually won over the cooperation and surrender of children. However, a child surrendering to parents is a choice between a child and God. Some children have behavioral issues that prevent the child from being able to submit to parents, in which case parents would have to continually submit to the child, with the child being a prodigal son.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke your children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!