"Talking back" - why punishment doesn't work (pro-social mirror, in child format)

 Manty parents hate when their child "talks back" to them. Verbal disrespect is a common behavior of various ages and stages of development. However, punishment or control of a child for any reason, including to be talked back to, is sin, and also a form of child abuse.

It says in Deuteronomy 21:18-21 KJV:

If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and that, they have chastened, shall not hearken to him: Then shall his father and his mother lay hold onto him, and bring him out to the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice, he is a glutton and a drunkard.

The reason for this law was not to punish young children for a "bratty mouth" but young men for offenses such as pillaging sprees, which would include things as kidnapping/burglary, rape, larceny of one's neighbor's goods, etc. Basically, the suspect would not be a young child, but a young adult whose behavior ran afoul of the law. Due to the stigma involved in turning a child in for a crime against a parent, which was seen as a sign that the parent was the actual abuser. The parenting values then were actually one of pro-social rebellion, pro-social total submission/acceptance.

The parent protection laws are repealed in Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your child to anger, lest they become discourage. 

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is translated by the Greek root word ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers to momentary damages, including pain, shame, emotional distress, loss of items/tokens, reward manipulation, all stemming from parental entitlement, with parental entitlement being denoted by the Greek root word πλεονέκτης (Latin: pleonektés) and refers not simply to wanting things from a child, but wanting things from them to the point of seeking it out, and imposing it on a child, with said imposition leading to abuse/theft, meaning damages. This list of damages above is an exhaustive list, and a child can perceive any aspect of how you relate towards them, or behave around them, as abuse. With me, the wrong look, meaning one that the child victim found menacing, would be a form of sexual abuse.

This passage was written to the Christian Church in Colossae, where Greek fathers were imposing Hellenistic/Greco-Roman standards on Christian wives. The Apostle Paul here, in a subtle and convicting way, is convicting Christian fathers of harsh treatment of their children, namely which would impose damages, saying that a child's aggression often mirrors a parent's...Parenting in ancient Jewish culture was attachment-based, with mothers ranging close to their children, and punishment being outlawed under the Law of Moses except towards adults in a judicial setting. Think papoose bag, and you'll understand how children were brought up in that society, then.

Parents are not entitled to children coddling their sensitive and insecure feelings about children having opinions of their own. A child is going to differ with me on some things, and I'd expect her to be vocal about what she needs from me, including by asserting herself, perhaps even calling me names in the process...Of course she can "talk back". She can slap my face as well if I talk fresh. Children are an authority to their parents, and issue lawful and binding orders with their petitions for redress of grievance, verbally or non-verbally, depending on the age and development of the child.

Let the parents who impose parental entitlement on their child BURN! Let them SUFFER! DESTROY parents! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!