Hebrews 12:5-6: Why this passage is not a spanking passage

Most parents believe that the Bible is pro-spanking. The core proof that pro-spanking parents have for their theology in the New Testament is Hebrews 12:5-6. This passage is often re-used as a spanking passage. However, other parts of the Bible prohibit not just spanking, but other forms of punitive parents. The fact of the matter is that the passage in Heb. 12:5-6 refers to enduring hardship, not any punishment of a child. 

God's Word on enduring hardship is spelled out in Hebrews 12:5-6 KJV:

And ye have forgotten the exhortation that speaketh unto you as unto children, My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him: For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth.

The Greek root word translated "scourgeth" is μαστιγόω (Latin: mastigoó) and can have a figurative meaning to it, with the rod being a metaphor for enduring hardship. This sort of passage was written using a specific form of metaphor known as "rod language". After a long day at work, you instead said then "God whipped me hard today" God does not reach down from the heavens and literally whip His children. However, God punishes His children, like only He can, sending trials and tribulations the way of the believer. However, God only punishes His children when it does not harm them, whereas earthly parents only punish their children when it does, in fact, harm them.

God never intended for earthly parents to copy His Parenting methods. That is because earthly parents would harm the child if they punished their child, unlike when God punishes His children. Heb. 12:5-6 is not a spanking verse. However, God does weigh in on the spanking issue, and expands upon it. See Colossians 3:21 KJV:

Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.

The Greek root word translated "provoke...to anger" is ερεθιζο (Latin: erethizo) and refers here to offenses or damages, namely the slightest of personal offense perceived by a child, including, but not limited to, the slightest of offensive touch or speech perceived by a child, stemming from entitlement. It is one thing to stop spanking your children. However, it is not enough to stop spanking or punishing children. You need to avoid offense in children. Avoiding offense in children is the same as in other adults - be willing to give a meaningful apology whenever you hurt the feelings of another. Usually, all that is necessary is a reassurance of good intent coming from parents, such as when a child cannot accept an ordinary limit. However, if you ever lose your cool with as a parent - including when setting a limit - you definitely need to apologize whenever you lose your cool with your child, as losing your cool as a parent alone is entitlement, and was seen as entitlement in the Early Church. This passage cross-references the Eighth and the Tenth Commandments, with the Apostle Paul here convicting a group of Greek Christians who brought into the church their pagan custom of patrias potestas, which roughly translated as "power to the parent", namely the power to impose punitive sanctions onto children, such as spanking and other forms of punishment. Paul, contrary to popular legend, was anti-spanking, and opposed any and all punitive parenting in his secular writings. Attachment parenting was banned under Roman law, but the Early Christians did it anyway, obeying God over men.

The staple punishment of children in Ancient Greece was spanking a child to the bare bottom. Spanking was a pagan custom then. Paul would have none of it in the churches he oversaw as deacon. The Hebraic understanding of discipline instead involved praise and encouragement when children were caught being good, not punishment and force when children were caught misbehaving.

Parent anger directed towards a child was seen as parental entitlement in the Early Church. Parental entitlement consists of a backbone that consists of parent anger towards children. Most parents in modern times are entitled as parents. However, most parents in the Early Church instead were motivated by worry or concern as parents.

The depraved and entitled parents who provoke their children to anger through punitive parenting will not inherit the Kingdom of God! Let them be cast forever into the lake of fire and burning sulfur, which is the second death prepared for Satan and his accomplices! Let them descend into the abyss which is the ever-burning Hell of fire and torment, suffering God's Wrath day and night forever and ever! Repent, for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand!